


projection oneshots

by shsl_loser



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Flashbacks, Gen, Rape Recovery, and i feel like putting those tags would make it seem like im writing a rape scene, because nothing explicit happens and purpled's rape is only implied, idk they just make me feel odd, im personally uncomfortable with tagging this as rape or underage, same with the mature tag, thats why this is teen or up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 11:48:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29558640
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shsl_loser/pseuds/shsl_loser
Summary: projecting onto mcyt's because i'm this close 👌 to just breaking downif any cc stated they are uncomfortable being in this i will take it down
Kudos: 10





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> TW: while no rape scenes occur, this chapter does talk about rape and rape recovery, there are instances of showing a child pornography too, purpled's mental state is troubling, stuff could be seen as victim-blaming, and purpled doesn't really have a full flashback, it's more like he's tormenting himself with stuff he doesn't want to remember, but i suppose that also could be considered a flashback in itself, there's grooming that a child is oblivious to, describing genitalia in a child-like way, blood is written, not explicitly but yeah
> 
> please take care of yourself and don't read if you can't handle

there was a reason purpled isolated himself. a reason he always decided to live in the most hidden-away areas, away from the prying eyes of his friends. the reason? he wasn't okay.

he knew by saying that he sounded whiny like a toddler denied candy, but it was the truth. even after seven years, he couldn't stop remembering _him._

purpled was nine when it started. though his memory of the events were hazier than they should be, partially blocked out to protect him, purpled knew exactly what happened. playing a video game in his room, purpled's step-father had asked to watch him. the older man's phone was left on the floor besides purpled, and the child, hearing a strange noise, looked over. there was a naked woman and man on the screen. the woman's face looked scrunched up, and that's all purpled could gather before the phone was snatched away.

"you're not supposed to see that," purpled's step-father had said, but looking back, purpled could remember the smile on his face.

this theme had continued. purpled would 'accidentally' see these types of videos, and his step-father would always answer questions he had.

"why is she making those noises?"  
"because she feels good,"

"does it hurt?"  
"not really,"

"what are they doing?"  
"it's called sex,"

question after question purpled asked, and they were always answered, until one day. he had asked a question about sex in front of his little brother, and their step-father immediately told him not to ask here, that it was their little secret, even after purpled's brother demanded to know what they were talking about. purpled was happy though, a secret, between him and his step-father? that was so cool!

until that final night. purpled was wearing teddy bear pyjamas. he remembered that clearly. purpled's step-father came in with a film on his phone, one purpled had been wanting to watch recently. he kept checking in on purpled in random intervals until the film was over, until he put one of the special videos on. "watch it," he said. they made purpled uncomfortable, but he was told to watch, so he did.

"what do you think of them?"

"they're funny," purpled replied, not really knowing what he was supposed to say. the answer seemed to have pleased his step-father though.

"yeah, they go in and out, in and out," purpled's step-father was making those weird hip thrusts they did in a lot of the videos, and looking closer purpled could see he had his special parts in his hand.

"r*ss!" he called. he didn't know why, but this felt like something he wasn't supposed to see. his step-father laughed it off. "come here purpled, let me show you something,"

there was blood on purpled's teddy bear pyjamas that night.

even so as he sat in his bed that still smelled like his step-father, he questioned whether or not he should tell his mother. he felt so, so wrong but he didn't understand.

and years down the line, at age seventeen, as he cried in his bathroom, he still never did.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: mention of implied past rape, mention of past grooming missing a rapist, sapnap views himself as a bad person for doing so, blood mention

was he a bad person? sapnap had been asking himself that question a lot. he still missed his step-father, even after what he did to him.

well, he didn't miss the step-father who left him crying in bloody teddy bear pyjamas, he missed the step-father who would watch him play video games, who snuck him chocolate late at night, who picked him up and spun him around and around. he was aware that his step-father only did that while grooming him, none of his other siblings getting the same treatment, but still.

sapnap ached for the man who may have had sinister intentions but gave him attention, ached for the man who cared.

he remembered drawing pictures of his step-father behind bars in elementary school, his teachers yelling at him to stop. he remembered writing down in the worry box 'am i a bad person for missing my step-dad?'

the question was never answered.

sapnap, logically, knows it's good his step-father was no longer living with them, who knows what he would do to sapnap's siblings if given the chance? sapnap also knows he wants nothing to do with his step-father and has had panic attacks whenever he sees him in public but still.

he misses him.

sapnap is a bad person.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter warning: mentions of past rape, mentions of genitals, cluelessness about one's own body
> 
> honestly, highkey embarrassed about this chapter but i have to get it off of my chest
> 
> if niki ever found this i would die

niki had a secret. well, not a secret, but an embarrassing little tidbit of information.

niki didn't know what the different parts of her genitals were, or where they were.

ever since her sexual assault at age nine, niki had skipped every single sex ed class since then, having flashbacks every time she was exposed to graphs of those specific body parts.

she knew some throw-away terms, like clitoris and labia, but other than that she was completely clueless, and had no interest in learning.

she was never going to have sex anyway, so why bother? why bother learning about her own body if it would just make her cry and ultimately leave her with nothing.

she'd rather be clueless than hurt and remembering _that._

**Author's Note:**

> i tried to type his name i just really fucking couldn't so i had to censor it


End file.
